You told me alcohol was my solution, not my problem. That, when agitated, “Be still and know that I am God.” Early on, I called my sponsor and said, “I did, and nothing happened. Now what?” He laughed, and said, “Ask for an intuitive thought, and in your case, patience.” Then he hung up. My friend Barry told me once, “Steve you know why you have a lot of patience?” I asked, “No, why.” He started laughing and said, “Because you haven’t used any!” Patience is definitely not one of my virtues yet. I’m in a big hurry. There are so many doors to walk thru along the way, and like the meditations said today, many seemed locked.
Yesterday, there was a lot going on and I used Step Eleven all through the day.
Meeting up with Scott at Flower Child @Desert Ridge, we spent a long time talking about life’s challenges, and the difficult feelings trying to accept the things we cannot change. Sometimes, acceptance and having a positive outlook for the future seems impossible; yet how did our sobriety happen? Discussion, surrender, and willingness had to come first; acceptance came later; in my case, often much later. My Rabbi says the Torah explains that we are God wrestlers; I need to know after 10 rounds when to accept I don’t have the power.
Finishing up work, I met Gail at Dave & Tina’s. Catching up on their trip to Washington DC, seeing the monuments & fireworks, hearing about their adventures, we had a delicious dinner. Somehow they had time to prepare after just coming home the night before! Dave said, “One step at a time” as Tina rolled out an amazing Apple Tort & homemade ice cream! How did the day work out? Pretty good, I am trying to do it again. Ride the Waves is coming out late. Oh well, the line from the album Can’t Buy a Thrill rang true; go back jack and do it again!” In recovery talk, it's "don't quit before the next miracle!"
So here we go, try to get back on the board and ride the waves today!
