Wait a minute. New Life? Reborn? The Our Father prayer? What is this, a cult?
I get it now; you’re trying to brainwash and convert me. I called my sponsor.
Gary laughed, and said something that made me laugh too.
“Steve, you need a brainwashing, my friend. You have an addiction that was fueled and driven by faulty thinking. This is not a cult; you can say any prayers you want; you can choose your own concept of God. We just have to learn how not to play God; how not to judge, manage, criticize and be offended. And also, you can leave anytime you want.”
Wow, I am super-sensitive; driven by fear, pride and shame, and yes, I admit, my life is not working. No wonder I drank and used. Gary led me to the Chapter We Agnostics, and we read it together. He was right; I needed a new concept of God; something personal.
Calling my Rabbi, I asked, “So where in the Torah does it talk about a personal relationship with God?” Rabbi laughed, and pointed out several prayers read at each service. “Steve, did you not think these were personal, to be taken to heart? Did you overthink them, or were you distracted by other thoughts?” Huh, God was there all along!
Thank You, God, for working with so many people to carry Your sweet love to me.