“You must manage your time. Be productive. Get your shit together!” These internal messages, and more, were screaming at me in early sobriety. “Why had I become such a failure, a loser? At one time, I seemed to be managing well.” I called my sponsor; he listened and then said something I still use today. “Steve, lack of power is our dilemma. After admitting this in Step One, we are guided to the other 11 Steps. It’s in the Steps we find the Power. The meetings give us opportunity to see how others are progressing, or sometimes, falling back into the disease. Remember, it’s an inside job. I’m here to help you work the Steps; just keep asking for willingness and the strength to trust the process and to do the work. It works if we work it!"
Yesterday, at the Run to the Pines car show, we ran into friends showing their cars or in attendance. There were many ‘67, ’68 and ‘69 Camaros that had the ID Plate stamped NOR – made at Norwood, Ohio where my Dad had been Plant manager. Wonderful memories flooded in. Some had photo books that showed the car being trailered out of a field or garage, close to salvage condition. Now, here they were; rebuilt from the bottom up, in beautiful, showroom condition! Many, customized and upgraded, were even better.
Like our own recovery, lots of work, patience, tools, and a team of specialists bring us back to life. It starts with something like, “oh, oh, the shape I’m in! “
All we needed to do was to “admit the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps.” (We Agnostics, p. 46)
In recovery, there are no 1st place awards; just an inner stamp of gratitude and awe at the Power that once was hidden from our reality. Thanks for showing me the process for rebuilding a wreck; including passing it on to others looking for a restoration process.