The power of prayer? I had prayed so many times, help me, help me? Yet I continued to slide into addiction, or other negative behaviors. Where is God? Why isn’t He helping me? Walking into recovery, I was dumfounded. I’ve only got a drug and alcohol problem; I never went out and drank a 6 or 12 pack.
I was trying so hard to manage, why didn’t God help me? I called my new sponsor and started to explain. He listened, then asked, “Steve, have you ever asked what God wanted from you?” What? I said, “I never thought of that.” He said, “Exactly. We’ve all been so busy playing God our whole lives, asking for what we wanted, for God to help us with a certain task or problem. Step 3 says “we offer, nor demand or help us to manage better." Write down your conception of God. Let’s go over your list tomorrow.”
That discussion opened the door to a whole new world. Later in Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions, it says, “Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. Though self-will may slam it shut again, as it frequently does, it will always respond the moment we again pick up the key of willingness.”
When we met, we shared that chapter and then said the 3rd Step Prayer.
For the first time, I was told that willingness is a gift; to be grateful for that; to keep sharing, asking for help along the way to put the key in the lock!
Yesterday, the day flowed so fast, one thing after another. Picking up Lea to go to Hogans Heroes, it was tough getting her in and out of the car, but upon arrival, the buzz & spirit in the room, the gift of fellowship was overwhelming. Sometimes, the key is a car key! But where to go?
My friend Tim H. said his sponsor would say, “Get in the car!” and that they named a meeting after that saying! Maybe that's the secret to go with the flow?
Thanks for telling me that faith is the key; to pick it up and get onboard for a journey to a better life.